ATOM feed
I suffer from anxiety. Well, not exactly suffer, as I really have it under control, but I always have had problems in this area. As a child at school with the nuns I had a twitch, which often made me a target for punishment; slapping and caning and ridicule. It wasn’t controllable, but I don’t think they understood that. There were probably other reasons, I got hit a lot. I’ve learned since that it would have been Tourettes that I had, and I always feel sad for the kids that I see with it today.
I don’t recall having any problems with this from about my very early teens, but it came back in the late 80s very dramatically. I was studying at the time, and was doing a written exam when I suddenly lost my vision. It became so blurry that by the time I had finished the exam I was very distressed. I could only barely see what I was writing. But I did finish, and luckily marked well enough as I needed the score.
I did not relate my loss of vision to stress at that time and put it down to eyesight problems. It was only when I was diagnosed with cancer a year or so later, and doing some research on causes, that I began to understand the connection between stress and illness.
I have wondered, over the years, at the wisdom of my chosen career. Looking back I can see that I have not made it easy for myself, working as I have with a lot of people contact, new people. I was an early user and teacher in the fledgling computer industry for business and accounting applications. Heady stuff, and a lot of fun - I’ll probably post more about those times one day.
These days I have problems relaxing. Does this happen to anybody else? I think I am just not used to having time to do what I want to do, and keep feeling guilty when I sit for hours blog-chatting instead of working at something. And then I’ll be out in the garden, and feeling guilty and thinking I should be in at the computer because I haven’t kept up with the blog or emails for a day or two.
Earlier this year I started a study course in professional editing and proofreading. I have been reasonably diligent and to day I have POSTED THE LAST ASSIGNMENT!! hurrah! hoorah! woo-hoo! FINISHED!
I don’t recall having any problems with this from about my very early teens, but it came back in the late 80s very dramatically. I was studying at the time, and was doing a written exam when I suddenly lost my vision. It became so blurry that by the time I had finished the exam I was very distressed. I could only barely see what I was writing. But I did finish, and luckily marked well enough as I needed the score.
I did not relate my loss of vision to stress at that time and put it down to eyesight problems. It was only when I was diagnosed with cancer a year or so later, and doing some research on causes, that I began to understand the connection between stress and illness.
I have wondered, over the years, at the wisdom of my chosen career. Looking back I can see that I have not made it easy for myself, working as I have with a lot of people contact, new people. I was an early user and teacher in the fledgling computer industry for business and accounting applications. Heady stuff, and a lot of fun - I’ll probably post more about those times one day.
These days I have problems relaxing. Does this happen to anybody else? I think I am just not used to having time to do what I want to do, and keep feeling guilty when I sit for hours blog-chatting instead of working at something. And then I’ll be out in the garden, and feeling guilty and thinking I should be in at the computer because I haven’t kept up with the blog or emails for a day or two.
Earlier this year I started a study course in professional editing and proofreading. I have been reasonably diligent and to day I have POSTED THE LAST ASSIGNMENT!! hurrah! hoorah! woo-hoo! FINISHED!
NOW I can relax... or can I?
Shouldn’t I be doing something constructive with my free time? I know I should be doing something about my weight and health, I need to get out more, walk more, join a gym or something? Mind you, I am thinking about putting a garden seat in the backyard, that might encourage me to just sit and read... maybe?
9 Comments
Well here are few additional thoughts for you!! But first grab a cup of tea or whatever and have a relaxing read about it !!
In the modern day brain it is understood that it is the frontal lobes that allow us to clearly identify our "consciousness" and make" executive decisions" when required, on any number of complex and abstract matters. Such development of the frontal lobes does however have a downside, particularly as you say where you subject yourself to a high stress industry. When this becomes too great we loose control by the frontal lobes to the more primitive areas of the brain. As this occurs, initially the two are in "conflict" until such time as the lower brain takes control. When we lose this control of the frontal lobes it is similar to losing control of an "Executive Manager" of the brain and is unable to function efficiently.
That means you are operating at a much lower level, largely from an instinctive, survival mode, without the flexibility and higher level thinking provided by the frontal lobes.
I quote from Edward Hallowell -psychiatrist -an Article from Harvard Business Review -re published in the Work Space area of the Financial Review on Tuesday 15 March 2005.
"As a specialist in learning disabilities, I have found that most dangerous disability is not any formally diagnosable condition like dyslexia or ADD (attention deficit disorder). Its fear. When the frontal lobes approach capacity and we begin to fear that we can't keep up, 'the relationship between their higher and lower regions of the brain take an ominous turn. In survival mode, the deep areas of the brain assume control and began to direct the higher regions.
As a result the whole brain gets caught in a neurological Catch 22. The deep regions interpret the messages of overload they receive from the frontal lobes in the same way they interpret everything. They furiously fire signals of fear, anxiety, impatience, irritability anger or panic. In a futile attempt to do more than is possible, the brain paradoxically reduces its ability to think clearly."
This can happen a lot easier than we can imagine. Try depriving your self of sleep, become unfit and put yourself in a stressful, hardworking environment when you become "fearful" of not meeting those deadlines.
Under such circumstances there is a good chance your frontal lobes will become overworked to the extent they surrender to the more primitive areas of the brain. We see it all the time don't we? Highly charged emotional decisions, deprived of any creativity, and viewed in purely simplistic terms of who's to blame. Rage is a common reaction. It is also interesting to consider what happens when we are no longer "in control" caused by the temporary or permanent loss of functionality provided by frontal lobe control. We are greatly diminished and lose our perspective to the extent that our "consciousness” is diminished, as we become reliant on instinctive type responses.
Fortunately the solution is simple. Look after those fragile frontal lobes with adequate sleep, a sensible diet and a regular exercise programme. Plan ahead and don't become "fearful" of deadlines, for it is far better to negotiate a postponement, then to risk the "disaster” of a frontal lobe overload. Make sure you take short breaks at work and wherever possible, discuss matters, rather than e-mail
when you are talking to someone, your brain begins to buzz, releasing pleasurable feelings similar to endorphins when you exercise. This will happen even when you are in a confrontation situation. Providing you don't allow your emotions to "take over" you will feel better afterwards? It is preferable to sending an e mail.
Have you ever noticed, when making presentations to smaller groups, in an interactive mode, how you always feel better than addressing large groups of people when you are in "remote" mode?
When giving presentations I had wondered why those to small groups seemed more successful. Was it the material? Was I more relaxed? Were those present more receptive when in a smaller group, or could it be that the interactive format meant that we were all receiving pleasurable stimuli, similar to endorphins, that made us feel appreciative afterwards.
I would like to hear all about how you plan to relax more and reduce your stress.
In the meantime, can I send out a "Red Alert"? Be kind to those fragile frontal lobes.
They depend on your tender, loving care much more than you imagine.
On another aspect, according to Elkhonen Goldberg, Clinical Professor of Neurology at NY school of medicine and Director of the Institute of Neuropsychology and Cognitive performance the more positive of Tourette's is a for those efected to also have a particular quicknes of wit, reminiscent of a fencing match, a unique mental qurkines, quickness , with jousting flashes of humour!!
My best wishes
I have done that proofreading and editing course (well almost!).
Della, don't beat yourself up about relaxing. We are allowed to, you know. But I can understand how you feel. I have dropped back to two days a week working and at first I wondered what I would do. I didn't wonder for long. My time is filled up and I feel so much better for cutting back.
We need to be nice to ourselves more often.
Take care
I suffer panic/anxiety attacks, too, Della...I worked in the hospitality industry and fashion industry for years, always dealing upfront with the public and having to put on my 'Aunty Mame' act...or 'hostess with the mostest!'
I guess that's why these days I enjoy my own privacy and space so much.
Della, that garden seating looks like paradise. Just have it there at the ready, along with a good book, and when you get the urge for some relaxation, make yourself a cup of tea and promise yourself a certain amount of time FOR YOU. You'll feel so much better. And remember to have a nice pillow nearby in case you want to have a nap.
Joining a gym would be good too, especially if you do classes rather than just a workout with equipment. I find that the social interaction is just a important as the physical exercise.
Lindsay, thank you for your efforts to get this to me. It is much appreciated. Everything that is said here, your own comments and the quotes strike home with me. I know the expression 'paralysed by fear' is real.
So that is where I get my 'smart mouth' from... and I always thought I got it from my mother!
I have always said that I could happily live my life as a hermit - that's about as far as you can get from stresses and decisions, but apparently that was not meant to be my lot.
I enjoy training, and have done a lot of one-on-one as well as more recently in the class-room. There were times when I would take a group of 12 to 14 people, new intake trainees - for a 4, sometimes 6, weeks period; 8 hours a day, 5 days a week.
This was quite challenging, but also, I have to say, the best work I have ever done, I loved it... but it took all of my health and mental resources to stay up there!
Thanks again, Lindsay, for your interest and helpful response.
Hi Della, I think that swing looks great and there is no harm in relaxing. It pays to get some exercise while you can. Just walking is good
and swimming is better I believe. I am
sorry you suffer from stress, and hope you can balance it out with relaxation
Thank you so much Della for your kind words on my Companionship post, they are much appreciated. Take care,my
friend, Cheers, Merle.
puss, I was well pleased with the course, I really had no idea what was involved and the things you needed to know - it was quite an eye-opener for me. I was VERY happy I cut back too.
Lee, why do we do it to ourselves? I am sure there must be a physiological reason, I think Lindsay gave us some clues...
'aunty mame' - that's a good one!
Val, I am starting to shop around in ebay and places like that, I might have a play at auction if I find something. The one in the picture is sure to be too dear, but wow it looks comfortable. I can just see me asleep on it in the sun.
thank YOU Merle, I love to read your things.
Hi, We are both Gemini's (we know what that means)..lol and I also suffer from anxiety attacks, have it fairly under control but the support from my family pulled me through it.
thx for visiting my blog, will post pictures of the kids soon.
Hi Dellab,
Take time for yourself and learn to relax more as we say here (Take time to smell the roses)
When we retired and moved too the Country I didnt know a soul, so i joined the bowling clubs learnt to bowl and when i was diagnosed with cancer then lost My Hubby 6 months later if it wasnt for family and my bowling friends i wouldn't have got through this difficult time.
Sooooooooooooooo relax relax and most of all take time out for yourself.
Post a Comment
Links to this post:Create a Link
<< Home